Communication by
Force
While trying to answer a telephone call from a spiritual
advisor, I inadvertently missed the as a result of a call drop. I returned the call immediately, but got
voicemail. I waited three minutes to
call and again was sent to voicemail. I
hung up; then received a call about ten minutes later. The beginning conversation was about the fact
that it took us about 12 minutes to connect a cell-to-cell phone call. We were both trying to force a call through
to each other with constant callbacks, without waiting after each initial
call. Several things are noteworthy during
the fifteen minutes of failure to communicate.
(1) A dropped call, (2) returned calls from both parties during the same
time period (phone lines are jammed, creating friction), causing (3) busy lines
and an inability to make contact (creating unforeseen perceptions).
When the lines of communication between two parties are
disrupted, for whatever reason, clear messages become distorted, and are likely
to fail altogether. In many ways, the
chain of phone call attempts in the paragraph above parallels an occurrence of people
making a face-to-face or device-to-device effort to talk. When two parties attempt to talk, but miscommunicate,
significant nuances occur and potentially become a barrier to a flowing conversation. Forcing issues on one another, without
establishing clarity, can, and do drive parties farther and farther apart. Negative persistence by one creates resistance
by the other, thereby resulting in further strife and conflict.
The message here is that force is a barrier to
communication. Patience, clarity and
nonresistance go a long way when trying to convey a message to another. So, when making an effort to communicate with
one where there is a barrier, wait for the lines between parties to clear, and
then proceed with a smooth flow, without resistance.
